Being in the world of talent solutions and HR, we spend a huge amount of our time interviewing candidates. Basically, we spend a lot of time in rooms with hopefuls looking to land their next job or career move, and there’s something about that room that can bring out the strangest in people. Over the years, we’ve heard some ridiculous, strange, and downright insane things, so we thought we’d put some together to give you a giggle:
Interviewer: What’s your greatest weakness?
Candidate: Women. That’s why I’m looking for a new job. I had an affair with my boss’ wife.
Interviewer: Why should we hire you?
Candidate: I would be a great asset to the events team because I like to party all the time.
Interviewer: What do you have planned for the future?
Candidate: Lunch.
Interviewer: No, like long term.
Candidate: Oh, dinner.
Interviewer: Why do you want this job?
Candidate: Because I’ve always been very passionate about not starving to death.
Interviewer: What attracted you to the role?
Candidate: Honestly, I don’t even know why I’m here. My mom said it’s good practice.
Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in five years?
Candidate: On a beach, bro.
Interviewer: Why do you want to leave your current role?
Candidate: Because my boss is an idiot, and I can’t take it anymore.
Interviewer: What’s your availability?
Candidate: Limited as Thursday and Friday are drinking time.
Interviewer: Why were you fired from your last job?
Candidate: I beat up my boss.
Interviewer: What’s your greatest quality?
Candidate: Well, when I was in prison, I learned to be patient.
Interviewer: There’s a two-year gap on your CV. Can you tell me about that?
Candidate: I couldn’t be bothered to work.
Interviewer: What’s your worst quality?
Candidate: I’m kind of unreliable.
Interviewer: Tell me about your biggest challenge recently?
Candidate: Well, I started breastfeeding recently, and that’s tough.
Interviewer: What do you like doing on the weekend?
Candidate: Well, I’m young and single so….
Interviewer: Why are you looking to relocate?
Candidate: I’m not wanted in my current state.
Interviewer: Why did you leave your last job?
Candidate: I have a problem with authority.
Interviewer: Why do you want a new job?
Candidate: Because alcohol is getting more expensive.
Interviewer: Why do you want to work for us?
Candidate: I saw the ad and thought why not!
Interviewer: What are your assets?
Candidate: I own a bike.
Interviewer: When have you demonstrated leadership skills?
Candidate: My World of Warcraft game, I pretty much run the show.
Interviewer: Use three adjectives to describe yourself.
Candidate: I hate questions like this.
We couldn’t make this stuff up if we tried.